Give me Space!

I'll tell you what really chaps my ass- pregnant or not. When stupid people park their cars so close to you in a parking lot that you can barely open your car door. What are these people thinking?!? You're just asking to have your car dented my my forceful opening of the door.

But now that I have a giant belly, it's even more annoying to try to squeeze my way in and out of the car in tight spaces. After work today, I found myself at Trader Joe's picking up some dinner items. I can't stand Trader Joe's parking lot as it is. It's always overcrowded and the spaces are too small for even small vehicles. So I parked my SUV in between the lines with plenty of space for the car on my right. There was no car on my left, the drivers side.

I go in, do my shopping and come out with 2 heavy bags of grocery. I could not believe what I saw when I walked out. If I hadn't have been so shocked, I would've snapped a picture. Some jerk parked his car literally 6 inches from my car on the drivers side. So close, that I couldn't even attempt to squeeze my way in to slam the car door into his car. JERK! I have never had this happen to me to this extent. Not even able to squeeze in and open the door?!? WTF?

I stood there, dumbfounded for a minute. Then I realized the only way my pregnant ass was going to be able to get in the car was to climb in through the passenger door. Thats right. Climb across the vehicle. Because I'm so limber these days, why the hell not!?

So, with steam coming out of my ears I climbed in and across. Once I settled in the drivers seat, I noticed some dipshit walking over towards the car with headphones in. I knew it had to be his car, so I sat, watching him. Hell hath no fury like a pregnant woman who's just had to CLIMB across the passenger seat in order to enter her damn car. The rage was sitting, waiting to come out of the cage.

I rolled down my window and yelled, "Nice park job you jackass! I'm 8 months pregnant and just had to climb across my car in order to get in. What the hell were you thinking parking so close to my car!?!?"

Now, I'm never an eloquent speaker in these situations. In fact, there were a few more choice words I screamed, but since this is a public forum, I'm not sure who reads it, so I'm attempting to keep it clean.

The lovely man responded with, "Oh, I'm sorry. I parked in between the lines, didn't I?" And swiftly got in his car.

It took all of my might not to jump out of the damn car and strangle the man. Instead, I peeled off, foaming at the mouth, enraged at the possibility that some human beings are so stupid and ignorant. It's just another case and point why I hate that parking lot. No matter how you park, you're squeezed in far too tight.

That, my friends, will be the last time I ever use a parking space at that place. From now on, it's back to making my own spot, wherever the hell I feel like making one....away from other cars.

And now, on to much bigger and brighter things. IT FEELS LIKE SPRING OUT!!!

Hallelujah!!!